Let it be said that for all my efforts to act tough in order to survive, I am, quite honestly, very soft and gooey in the centre. Like a fudge brownie maybe. Ha.
I mean, listen—when you come for the people I love, I will not hesitate to maim you (I’m talking mainly about words, they have edges, too, but okay, I am quite skilled in…arnis hehe). I really, really hate confrontations, and would soon run for the opposite direction—though I hear so much a disparaging comment about the loves of my life, and I’ll turn savage, just like that.
But then—on the other end of the spectrum, just one word of endearment from my Master, or a tender look, or one teeny, tiny act of kindness that he wasn’t really thinking about—and I’m a puddle. Instantly. Hey ho, get a bucket and a mop, because someone’s going to have to scoop me up and gather me back to myself. I can be fucking giddy.
I mean, listen—I already don’t have much for eyes, and then Daddy says good girl and you look at me and there’s just mouth and teeth and a big nose and slits for eyes because the widest smile has taken over my face you have no idea.
All this to say—here are some things Doms do that take my breath away, in no particular order:
Giving me your attention. There is no bigger turn-on for me than having your focus and your time, especially when I know that you are busy and that your mind is on other things. But then you pause everything and talk to me—ugh, that’s my kryptonite. I don’t need anything else, you know. Just you. Always you, every time.
Being dominant in general. I like it when you naturally display your authority, even if not in a sexual setting. When you make snap (yet sound) decisions, when you say things with confidence, when your presence simply commands a room, when you’re assertive over others (and me) yet still be sensitive to the other person—I just want to kneel at your feet, with my palms on my lap.
Being alpha male without being an asshole. Yes, there are Doms out there who think being a ‘bad boy’ is cool, which for them means disregarding other people’s feelings, and thinking they’re the centre of the universe. That’s not for me. I want you and your power—but I also want your kindness. You know that being in control also means carrying a sense of responsibility—and I relish that.
Displaying your possessiveness. Especially if you can’t help it? Ugh. That’s the most delicious thing. When you can’t help but say, mine, in and out of bed—trust me, my panties are ruined for the day.
Fucking me rough. I love it when you spank me, when you put your hands around my throat, when you pull my hair, when you play with my nipples, when you bite me, spit on me, tease my clit, slam me against a wall, throw me on the bed—you are greedy with your lust because you know I’ll also give you everything I’ve got.
Fucking me slow. When you push inside me inch by inch, when you shower me with kisses, when you touch me everywhere, when put your mouth on my skin—it feels like it will never end, just an infinite loop of pleasure.
Making me beg. When you say no, I tremble.
Owning my orgasms. Telling me when I can cum, because everything of me is yours. Making me cum in so many ways. With your cock inside me or in my mouth. With your finger in my ass. With my pussy on your face. Wanting my juices. Making me squirt.
Taking care of me. This can refer to many things—from making sure I meet my bedtime to leaving me a voice message for me to wake up to. From giving me a bath to brushing my hair, from giving me tasks to actually asking what I want and listening.
Knowing what I need even if I can’t even explain it to myself. I am independent, perhaps too headstrong and intense (and stubborn hehe) for some—but as my Daddy, you are quite capable of handling me. Not only that, you’re aware that I can also be oblivious, and sometimes even lose my language, particularly when it comes to the inner-workings of my heart. But no matter—you know what I need. You can see through me so plainly that at times I almost want to be embarrassed to my core (well—I already am!) but that is quickly replaced by my amazement to how much you observe.
Showing me your approval. Whether it’s through the tone of your voice or the look in your eyes or your chosen words, I’m a sucker for these. I so want to make you happy very much. And when you give me a command but phrase it in a certain way, like it’s a request or something that would greatly please you—ugh. Done. Leave it to me and I will move mountains.
Making space for yourself. You know how there are people in your life who come and go, like wraiths or transient beings perhaps, and it’s totally fine? You are the exact opposite. You make your presence known, and how—and I welcome that, just as you give me room in your life, too. I definitely feel your absence when you’re not here.
Holding me. Sometimes words just won’t do.
Encouraging me not to deny myself pleasures. My happiness is important to you, as well as my sense of contentment. Pleasing myself pleases you.
Giving me permission to enjoy myself. I always seem to put others’ needs before me and I have great difficulty saying no sometimes. Not that I’m a pushover—it’s more about this energy of giving, which in turn lends a deeper sense of worth, of being of value to others. The downside is when it comes to myself, I feel like I am not allowed a lot of things, to the point of policing my own joy. You look out for me and see to it that I get what I need, even if sometimes that just means telling me it’s okay to have fun.
Giving me rules. We both understand that I need structure, and you are there to provide me that kind of clarity.
Liking me just the way I am. You love my body and my mind. The sight of your hard cock, precum leaking, makes me feel empowered and powerful. Truth be told, I have difficulty comprehending sometimes, your desire of me, but I’m selfish so I take it anyway.
Using your Dom voice. Every sub knows this. Even the gentlest Doms have a Dom voice. Even when they’re writing you via email or sending a text. It’s there. Your Dom voice goes straight to my pussy. I am audibly easily stimulated, and when you use it, I’m yours, a hundred universes yours.
Making me feel safe. With you I always feel intensely vulnerable but at the same time totally uninhibited. I am able to tell you things I rarely share with or admit to anyone, even close friends, and I know that these will stay just between the two of us. I feel anchored and protected—I know if I hold out my hand, it will find yours, even in the dark.
Revealing your wantonness. I know that you’re always down to explore everything with me, and it’s so exciting when we see how far we can go together—in and out of the bedroom.
Sharing your limits. As much as you do your best not to deny me anything, you are also not afraid to be vulnerable with me and let me know when something is not your cup of tea. That level of trust is something I treasure. Moreover, it also shows me that you are aware of and know and respect yourself.
Telling me what’s wrong. Believing that I deserve to know the bad, not just the good—because I’m your partner, too.
Telling me you need me. Fuck, that just buries itself in my marrow. When you hold nothing back, when you’re so explicit and fierce in your need, I want to cling to you forever.
Not hiding your emotions. Oh, the look on your face, the timbre of your voice—when you cum for me, when I tell you no, when I say I need, when I cry, when someone hurts or threatens me, when you’re scared, when you’re tired, when you need—yes, yes, yes.
Allowing me to call you out. You want me to be safe all the time, even from you. You will never knowingly nor deliberately hurt me without my consent, but if you do, you want me to be upfront about it and tell you, without fear of punishment or abandonment.
Falling asleep and waking up beside me. Wanting to be next to me to kiss me goodnight and good morning. Always the big spoon.
Wanting me to wear your collar. The thought of me walking around uncollared for other Doms to snatch up grinds your gut. You have a deep desire and need for me to belong to you.
Getting turned on when I call you Daddy/Master. Names are very important to us. Just as I experience sweet, sweet pleasure in being called yours, along with various terms of endearments that make me flush, the feeling is mutual when I call you properly and I submit to you. I am yours to care for, to command, to punish, and to reward. Yours to protect. Yours to fuck. Yours to defile. Yours to cherish. Yours to own.